Logic has no imagination
"Failing isn't the end of the world. Quitting is."
- moi?
"At the end of this, no one will remember what you said. But people will remember what you do."
- Arthur Smith, C.E.O. of GS1 Canada
"i want what all men want. i just want it more."
- Kobe Bryant
"Heart is what separates the good from the great"
- Michael Jordan
"Sometimes...
only the struggle makes it worth it...
only the pain makes it sweet...
and only victory is the answer"
- Nike
"When that blood gets riled up, you're still going to see some of what they say is immaturity."
"It's not what you know. It's what you can prove."
-Denzel Washington in Training Day
Lyrics:
Kanye West - I Wonder
Find your dreams come true
And I wonder if you know
What it means, what it means
[chorus]
And I wonder if you know
What it means, what it means
And I wonder if you know
What it means to find your dreams
I've been waiting on this my whole life
These dreams be waking me up at night
You say I think I'm never wrong
You know what, maybe you're right, aight
[chorus]
You say he get on your fucking nerves
You hope that he get what he deserves, word
Do you even remember what the issue is
You just trying to find where the tissue is
You can still be who you wish you is
It ain't happen yet
And that's what the intuition is
When you hop back in the car
Drive back to the crib
Run back to their arms
The smokescreens
The chokes and the screams
You ever wonder what it all really mean
[chorus]
And I'm back on my grind
A psychic read my lifeline
Told me in my lifetime
My name would help light up the Chicago skyline
And that's what I'm
Seven o'clock, that's primetime
Heaven'll watch, God calling from the hot lines
Why he keep giving me hot lines
I'm a star, how could I not shine
How many ladies in the house
How many ladies in the house without a spouse
Something in your blouse got me feeling so aroused
What you about
On that independent shit
Trade it all for a husband and some kids
You ever wonder what it all really mean
You ever wonder if you'll find your dreams
Thursday, November 13, 2003
i feel like... i'm missing out on stuff... what stuff? i have no clue in the world... something seems to be missing in me... what, i do not know... i get these.... phases... where i yearn to do something... yet... i dont act on it... i have all these ideas in my mind, yet it's never been put to use... i take no initiative...
i have no clue what i'm talking about anymore... my mind is blanking out once again... i need a break from life... where is the FUN in life...
i'm too tired now... the fight in me is dying... part of me is dying... i'm about to give in soon... i'm too weak... i cannot continue on with this fight one fight all attitude... part of me is telling myself to give in and give up... i've been through too much... i can only take so much before i die... the other part of me is telling me to keep fighting... to keep resisting the temptation to quit... if i've come through on every occasion in my life, i can come through in this instance... if i quit, i lose respect for myself... what am i to do?? i'm about to break............
i cannot fully comprehend myself... maybe i'm too scared of what i may find out... i'm scared of myself?
i finally got around to doing some devos (from september), and this is what i found while reading:
Henri J. M. Nouwen - Permit YOUR pain to become THE pain
Your pain, deep as it is, is connected with specific
circumstances. You do not suffer in the abstract. You suffer because
someone hurts you at a specific time and in a specific place. Your
feelings of rejection, abandonment, and uselessness are rooted in the
most concrete events. In this way all suffering is unique. THis is
eminently true of the suffering of Jesus. His disciples left him,
Pilate condemned him, Roman soldiers tortured and crucified him.
Still, as long as you keep pointing to the specifics, you will
miss the full meaning of your pain. You will decieve yourself into
believing that if the people, circumstances, and events had been
different, your pain would not exist. THis might be partly true, but
the deeper truth is that the situation which brought about your pain
was simply the form in which you came in touch with the human
condition of suffering. Your pain is the concrete way in which you
participate in the pain of humanity.
Paradoxically, therefore, healing means moving from YOUR pain to
THE pain. When you keep focusing on the specific circumstances of
your pain, you easily become angry, resentful, and even vindictive.
YOu are inclined to do something about the extenals of your pain in
ourder to relieve it; this explains why you often seek revenge. But
real healing comes from realizing that your own particular pain is a
share in humanitiy's pain. That realization allows you to forgive
your enemies and enter into a truly compassionate life.That is the
way of Jesus, who prayed on the cross: "Father forgive them for they
do not know what they are doing" (Luke 23:34). Jesus' suffering,
concerete as it was, was the suffering of all humanity. HIS pain was
THE pain.
Every time you can shift your attentiion away from the external
situation that caused your pain and focus on the pain of humanity in
which you participate, your suffering becomes easier to bear. IT
becomes a "light burden" and an "easy yoke" (Matthew 11:30) Once you
discover that you are called to live in solidarity with the hungry,
the homeless, the prisoners, the refugees, the sick, and the dying,
your very personal pain begins to be converted into THE pain and you
find new strength to live it. Herin lies the hope of all Christians.
